


Thorin and Kíli

by Judayre



Series: Pair and Gender Challenge [8]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Gender binary is for wimps, challenge writing, tagged in chapters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-26
Updated: 2014-11-28
Packaged: 2018-02-18 19:44:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2359988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Judayre/pseuds/Judayre
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>four different Thorins and Kílis.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The explanation for the series is [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1145580/chapters/2319756) for anyone who wants to refresh their memory.
> 
> This first chapter is in the Line of Durin verse.

If there was one word that always helped calm Thorin, it was uncle. He had lost so much through the years and felt the load on his shoulders increase daily. But when Fíli beamed his golden smile and called him uncle and reached out to him, nothing else mattered.

He had never expected to hear the word in any other voice. They had given up Kíli of their own will. Given him up for his own protection and though they hated it they never regretted it. He hoped that someday they could meet the lad, but he had never really believed they would be safe enough.

Kíli was a good lad. He had seen that from the very beginning of the journey. And every time he heard that bright, open voice - so different from Fíli - call out to Bofur or Bombur with the name that should have been given to Thorin, he frowned. Hearing the name was something he wanted, but directed to someone else hurt like little did.

When Kíli found out about his parentage Thorin was incensed, but part of him held out hope that maybe. Maybe he could be an uncle as well - the role that mattered the most. He felt awful for it, for feeling anything like joy that it could no longer be hidden.

The first time they had their heads bowed together, speaking quietly just the two of them. He had dared to name their relationship and Kíli responded, giving him the one thing he had ever wanted to hear.

He heard it again, with slowly building regularity, as they traveled. It was never said with the glee Fíli had when he had been a child, nor with the reverence Fíli gave it as a youth. But it was said with joy, with a shy regard and the beginning of love. And Thorin called him nephew and was glad of him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kíli looks up to his uncle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for toxic family being mentioned and someone being outed against their wishes in a public setting.
> 
> From the modern AU where Thorin is a trans man.
> 
> Here are previous pieces:  
> [Fíli goes to the prom](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1335373/chapters/2902849)  
> [Thorin fights for custody of his nephews](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024357/chapters/3149962)  
> [Thorin Oakenshield is free](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024357/chapters/3449702)  
> [Three times people were done](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024357/chapters/3575459)  
> [Bofur gets beat up again](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1470961/chapters/3175739)  
> [Thrailís is assaulted by friends of his brother](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024357/chapters/3761203)  
> [Kíli meets a new girl in school](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024357/chapters/4684665)

Kíli was not the perfect wonder that Fíli was. He never had been. He was too loud, too demanding, too everything. He did try. He tried, but how was he supposed to know what to do? His father had walked away from them, and his grandfather and uncle Frerin were always mean to his mama. 

He was seven when he first met his other uncle. Uncle Thorin and mama talked about all kinds of serious things, but she smiled more than he usually saw. And uncle Thorin never yelled. And uncle Thorin helped him with his homework, and cooked sometimes.

After that visit, Kíli started writing letters to uncle Thorin. He scribbled pictures for him and asked him about being good. Uncle Thorin never told him he was being silly, and that he should know what to do. Uncle Thorin gave him advice, and praised him when he did well, and believed in him.

Kíli was glad to go live with uncle Thorin when his mother died.

When uncle Frerin told the court that uncle Thorin "was really a woman," even Fíli didn't know wht to think. Perfect Fíli, who always did the right thing, hesitated over calling him uncle for weeks.

But uncle Thorin had taught Kíli how to be a good man. He had helped him and listened to him and believed in him. And how could Kíli do anything other than believe in him in return?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thorin explains gender to Kíli.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goes with:  
> [Bard has her first kiss](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024357/chapters/4163631)  
> [Bilbo meets Dwalin for the first time](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1145580/chapters/2319814)  
> [Bofur and Bombur decide to go on Thorin’s quest](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1470961/chapters/3126028)  
> [Balin arrives at Bag End](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1689998/chapters/3881320)  
> [Óin considers his cousin Balin](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1155507/chapters/2366815)  
> [Dwalin talks to Nori](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1392592/chapters/3052771)  
> [Bilbo is used to being stared at](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024357/chapters/3372758)

Kíli climbed into Thorin's lap and sat quietly, looking at the paperwork with wide eyes. Knowing the child, Thorin continued with his work and waited. It didn't take long - it rarely did before Kíli's carefully built patience came tumbling down.  
" _Why_ is everyone so interested in gender?"

Thorin leaned back and looked at the child. Fifteen (almost too big to sit in laps, and wasn't that a sad thought), brown from the sun, hair wild, wide brown eyes looking up at him and truly seeking an answer.

"Your gender is part of who you are," he said finally. "Like your family, your craft, your passions. It is how people know you."  
"But I don't pick my family," Kíli answered, one hand tightly holding Thorin's shirt in case he thought the child was complaining. "And you'll pick my craft, right? I'll work with you in the forge?"

Thorin shrugged. "If you wish to work the forge when you are older, of course I will teach you. But you might find yourself called to something else. And when you are older, you might pick a new family. A spouse. Children of your own. You will make choices to tell everyone who you are. Your gender is just one of those choices. It is something you will explore when you are older, and you will figure out what feels the most like you."

"Do I have to?"

Thorin's brows raised. "It is expected, Kíli. Everyone does. Most look forward to it."

"But do I _have to_? What does it really mean to be one thing or another?"

"It is how your present yourself. How you think of yourself. The way you dress and do your hair. Of course you have to make a choice. When it comes time, you'll know."

Kíli frowned but stopped asking questions, staying firmly in Thorin's lap as he continued working late into the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In one of the other segments, Kíli is refered to as "he." Honestly, I think he just picked one because he knew he was expected to. After getting to know Nori (who refuses to choose) I think he'll realize he actually has a choice, though he'll stick to using he pronouns because he's used to it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kíli watches as Thorin carves his child.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goes with:  
> [Thorin and Bilbo discuss how they got their children](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1596323/chapters/3521936)  
> [Bilbo plants a child in his garden](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024357/chapters/4710063)  
> [Bilbo and Thorin are happy with their children near](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024357/chapters/4768665)

Thorin still had bandages. He still couldn't put much weight on his left leg. He still had a patch over one eye. His breath still mostly came shallowly.

But he worked with a single minded intensity, as if he hadn't been lying near death less than a month ago. The hammer and chisel were held delicately in his hands, and he worked slow and patient, not seeming to feel any bodily discomfort at all.

Kíli was almost glad of it. If Thorin was his normal self, he would have noticed Kíli immediately. Kíli knew that he wasn't supposed to be there - carving was a deeply personal, deeply intimate act. Only the carvers were supposed to bear witness to the new Dwarf being carved.

But Kíli couldn't just let his uncle run off for hours at a time. It wasn't far enough from almost losing him for Kíli to feel safe leaving him on his own. And so he watched the process of creation. He was too young to feel the urge himself, but he had wondered about it ever since his uncle and father had explained it to him. And now he got to see it.

He saw the stillness in Thorin's face. He saw how he never hesitated with the hammer or the chisel. He saw the gentleness with which his uncle touched the stone that would be his child. There was a serenity in his uncle that he had never seen before.  
He wondered if his father had been the same over his stone. He wondered if he would ever feel that peace and certainty.

And he kept watch as his cousin took shape under his uncle's patient hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In a previous section, I referred to Dís as "she." I shouldn't have. Dwarves have no gender as we know it and all go by "he" in Westron because it's easier that way. When Kíli thinks about his father, that's Dís.


End file.
